She he is home. She is sore. She is tired. And she is someplace deep within herself that I’m not allowed… but she is home and she is tumour free!
The surgery took place late in the day on Monday and she was pretty much out of it until Tuesday night and then the pain took control and her attentions and energy went there. Yesterday a weird post op “depression” (for lack of a better word) took hold and even today she remains very quiet and introspective.
You’d think she’d be thrilled to have had “The Beast” removed… Or minimally, be a bit giddy to be out of the hospital and in her own home. However something has hold of her and for now she remains quiet and withdrawn.
As much as I want to chat and make a fuss over her…. I will let her be. I will let her sleep. For when she wakes she does have mountains move. Doctors to see, tests to have done, chemo to schedule all whilst trying to heal, both the physical wounds and all of the emotions ones.
Let her sleep for when she wakes she will move mountains.
rantings of a madwoman 
You are being so very wise, it’s really incredible and very inspiring! Everyone should have a mum like you! xxxx
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You are too kind, but I think both my daughters would strongly disagree! Hahahahaha! xxxx
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You are incredible! How difficult to have to hold your tongue and not drive her crazy! I know how hard that is because I have a daughter who just wants me to let her be in all situations and I am an emotional whirlwind. I have learned its best to just smile and leave her alone.
You are a wise and wonderful Mom no matter what your girls think. Someday maybe they will know just how great you are.
BTW – she probably is thrilled to have gotten rid of the beast, but maybe a bit overwhelmed and stunned with the outcome. She needs time.
All my love and prayers to you all!
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Oh, no, no no! I didn’t hold my tongue and I did drive her crazy!!!! I was an emotional whirlwind and pissed her off on numerous occasions! Nice of you to think I could have possibly been incredible! Thanks! xxxx
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Oh my gosh – did you make me laugh!!! In my defense you did say “I will let her be.” I was probably projecting myself onto you. My daughter is 48 (What?!?!) and it took me until probably 2 or 3 years ago to learn to let her be.If not she would shut me out altogether. This way we can coexist peacefully.
It amazes me what lengths we (mothers) go to when we want to protect/continue a good relationship with our children. Why are we the ones that have to change? Oh I know we don’t HAVE to, but I hate the feeling of being tolerated. And I REALLY hate not knowing everything. I wanna fix it all. And I can’t and besides she wouldn’t let me…Oh well, that’s another blog, isn’t it?
Love you and thanks so much for the good laugh out loud I had this morning.
Caryn
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Yeah, yeah laugh oh wise one! I apparently just learned what you learned years ago… but than you are older than me right? ; ) xxx
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Melissa – I’m so pleased to hear the ‘beast’ has been slain and it’s out of her body! And that it still leaves her with another healthy ovary….this is a massive positive!! And how lucky is she to have such a wise owl of a mum who recognises when she needs to withdraw and take stock despite all the things you must be feeling/needing yourself as her mother…sending you all much love, support and strength as you turn this corner and move onto the next phase xxx
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Thanks Angela, I wasn’t wise. I was intrusive and overbearing! …but it was done out of love and concern. xxx
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Conquered step one, enjoy and prepare to more forward with the same strength, love, commitment and support!
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xxx
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