I thought my “ranting” days were over except for the one off, positive, good news post about Arielle’s progress… And I was happy to not be “ranting!” Seriously, I have other interests, other Blogs, other websites to maintenance… and I was happy keeping myself busy elsewhere. I didn’t miss ranting!
However, fate has decided to once again play havoc with my world…. My brother Tommy (the last living relative I have, from my original childhood family) called me today to tell me he has been diagnosed with lung cancer.
I will let that sink in…
Lung. Cancer. Brother.
It has been exactly 125 days since my youngest daughter called to tell me she had ovarian cancer. One hundred and twenty five fucking days! And I spent most of those days in a panic, traveling, worrying, crying, praying, bargaining, and yes ranting. And although things are looking good there, we are by no means out of the woods yet.
As I said, I couldn’t make this shit up.
The good news it it has not metastasized, the bad news is the tumor is pressing on his aorta (that can’t be good!) and if surgery is an option at this point, it may be very risky option.
Needless, to say I am in shock and disbelief. I don’t want to pull the poor, poor, pitiful routine… but seriously! Are you fucking kidding me?
What lesson could the Universe be trying to teach me? What am I doing that causes those closest to me get cancer?
I am at a loss to understand or make any sense of this.
Maybe if I stop saying “Fuck You” to cancer, do you think it might leave my loved ones alone?