About

Here you will find the rantings of a madwoman.

This Blog was born on the 4th of July, 2014 when I found out that my youngest daughter (31) had been diagnosed with a rare type of ovarian cancer.

I did what I had to do…  I lost my mind and started writing.

The thoughts, feelings and fears experienced in the weeks and months following that diagnosis had to be released.  If they had been held inside, I would have surely explode.

In the months following her treatment, surgery and recovery I found reason to “rant” about anything and everything.  So here you will also find miscellaneous, non-ovarian cancer related posts about things and thoughts that captured my eye or my imagination, along the way.

Three years after my daughter’s “series of unfortunate events,”  I was diagnosed with, not one, but two autoimmune diseases.  My world was once again turned upside down and I started writing again, in earnest.  “Better out than in,” my Mom used to say.

So how you ended up here I do not know…  but please feel free to enter this space, where I will try to explain what it feels like to have your guts ripped out, thrown on the floor and stomped on; along with addressing some of the other mysteries of my weird and wonderful life.

Warning:  I love words. I love using all kinds of words.  I especially love using obscenities to help emphasise what I’m trying to say…  If you are easily offended, you may want to reconsider entering this space. 

18 Comments

  1. Melissa, I don’t even know what to say, I’m so sorry to hear about your daughters diagnosis, cancer sucks! I will be reading along and sending lots of positivity and virtual hugs your way, your daughter sounds amazing, she’s lucky to have you supporting her through xxx

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  2. What a life, Melissa! I’m so,glad that you created this place to put some of the energy, rage and what ever else needs to show up. You’re very brave abpnd courageous as is Arielle. So much love…

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    1. Thanks Laurel. Not sure how brave I am… I was thrown in and I’m just trying to keep my head above water! …not much of a choice really. But you are right, what a life! Sending love and light back to you. Melissa xx ps thanks for reading my rantings.

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  3. Wow. I just posted on your other blog, and tgen found this. My heart goes out you and I hope with all my heart that your precious daughter will be In remission soon and this deadly dragon will never come back. I understand because I have been through this experience too. Our Jennifer was diagnosed with Hodgkins when she was 17. Stage 4. She did well through treatment but was not on the proven treatments, but a new protocol whereby she received a milder treatment to keep her from having another cancer down the line. I checked and Stanford was doing this new treatment too. Several patients relapsed during the treatment, but Jennifer, a stage 4 patient did not. My question was why they took a stage 4 patient and entered her in a new less evasive treatment when the old treatment had such success. Eventually, she did relapse, and we were told her best odds for survival was a bone marrow transplant. She had the transplant and died in her sleep. I hope you will be your daughter’s advocate and listen to your instincts. Question, question, question. Become as knowledgeable as you can. I will keep younand your daughternin my prayers.

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    1. Dear Peggy, Thank you from the bottom of my heart… The god news is that (thank God) my daughter has been cancer free for 3 years and 6 months… She had chemo and surgery and as of now “all clear.” We have 1.5-2.0 years to go before they will give her the “thumbs up,” but we are closer every day. My heart breaks to know that you lost Jennifer…. I am so very sorry to hear this. I cannot imagine your pain… I know what I suffered though chemo and surgery and recovery… My thought and prayers are with you. Thank you so very much for your kind words and your prayers…. we accept them with thanks and grace. Namaste

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  4. I finally somehow found this..the beginning of your blog. Such a terrible journey. WHY I found yyou/your blog is a mystery to me but i will tell you that I need to read your words. You speak the way I do and seem to think the way I do and even including the best f word ever. Im reading words written a few years ago and am praying for a happy ending..I send you loveand gratitude.

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  5. now i see that your daughter made it and someone else lost their child. I have no words. Thank you for this opportunity to read and connect. If there reallyy is a God I say thank you for blessings.

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  6. I am writing on an older post here — im trying to find you on facebook. looking on the gca page. would love to read your posts. cant find you.

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